Tuesday, March 30, 2010
It's spring break week here at the Case house. I had entertained ideas of fun activities, one on one time and lots of bonding. Kind of a much needed break for my kiddos and I and a chance to re-connect. Doesn't it just sound too good to be true? Exactly.
Prelude: Hannah has been a strong-willed, independent, keep-your-eyes on her every minute child from about 18 months and has not let up since then.
PROBLEM #1: Two weeks ago I get a call from hannah's principal. I'm about to die, since I have NEVER gotten a call from the principal for my kids. We'll just condense things to keep it moving: she had been stealing little boxes of cereal from the cafeteria after school to eat on the walk home. When confronted by principal she lied right to her face and said it was her second-grade friend. Principal questions friend, who said it was Hannah. Principal has to break out interrogation techniques to call hannah's bluff, who said her friend (our neighbor) had been 'making her do it". She get punishment from the school (no recess at lunch and cleans the lunch room),apologizes to lunch ladies, grounded from us, extra house chores given, she doesn't get to walk home or play with friend/neighbor and has to miss out on slumber party that weekend with friend.
We think we're behind it. Nope.
PROBLEM #2: Get a call from her teacher that Hannah stole a game piece during a class activity and she said she didn't do it and teacher had to line everyone up and pat pockets and it was in Hannah's pocket. WHAT?? Extra discipline, apology to teacher, #9 stern lecture about lying AND stealing. Lots of 'we're disappointed in you'. Teacher says "Hannah is such a smart little girl, I NEVER would have thought she would take it." By the way, we've had some class snacks missing.
PROBLEM #3: We really think we're done. Nope. She steals her cousins bunny and lies to her Grandma on the phone (who was asking if she had seen it) and her cousins. Has to apologize to all parties, give it back and LOTS of toys are taken out of her bedroom and grounding is longer.
It is at this point I say, spring break is about cancelled and you can't do any of the activities we had planned.
PROBLEM #4: I know this is ridiculous, right? Mike finds a huge barrel of animal crackers in her closet on Friday that she had STOLEN from her classroom (it was snacks the parents donate) and stuck in her backpack. We are in shock, angered and really sad at the choices our girl is making. We tell her that her room will now have daily inspections, as well as daily back-pack inspections and we wouldn't be surprised if she gets suspended from school.
So here we are spring break week. We have to wait a WEEK before talking to the school. I took Taylor bowling with the cousins yesterday and she had to stay at Grandma's and do worksheets. We are going to have to deal with her school on Monday. I'm ready to get a cop car out to my house and have an officer talk to her. Sometimes these kids of ours surprise you, but I think I like the good surprises, not this.
It's easy to think "I must have not parented her well." I'm not thinking that. I feel confident in knowing Mike and I have taught her right from wrong. Maybe I am in the minority but I am pretty pissed off at my kid right now and I have no problem letting her know that. I don't want to be around her and I am angry with her decisions. Maybe some would say that is childish, but if I filter all my emotions to her, how will she really understand or be able to show me her true emotions? So I am speechless, along with Mike, and we are just taking this one day at a time. We have been very careful to let her know all along the way that she is NOT a bad child, that her decisions and actions are what we are having the problem with. We really don't want her to feel ashamed at herself, but to know her choices are what has been wrong.
This blog is a good place to vent, so venting is done. I'll let you know what happens when we meet with her teacher and principal (and perhaps the police officer).
There is no way to candy coat it: parenting sometimes really sucks.