Monday, April 5, 2010
WARNING: NOT SUITABLE FOR CHILDREN TO READ!
Let's just start with the fact that I feel like I am entering a new, um, phase in my life where I am being more honest. More honest with myself, my kids, my family and etc etc. Perfect timing since I have a daughter that is lying and stealing lately (see post below). I am trying to be more open with my kiddos so they don't have as many problems I feel I do as an adult of 33 years. I have always been taught to just suck it up (deny your true feelings ) and do what is "expected" and the "best way", while underneath you are feeling really conflicted with the true feelings you have been taught to stuff and stuff hard. Well, that doesn't get you far in life and apparently one child is figuring that out.
So I'm having a problem lying to my kids. Yep, I lie to them every Christmas, every Easter, and every time they lose a tooth. We are just taught to do that because our parents did the same for us. Uh, excuse me, but I know everything my parents did for me wasn't really great. It's okay, they were working on the best they knew how, but these are my kids and I get to choose (with the agreement of my husband). Well Sunday I chose to stop lying to them about the Easter bunny. Hello! Do they really still believe a bunny comes through your house at night and brings candy? My kids are 10 and 7 and they are pretty smart. Besides the fact it COMPLETELY takes away from the meaning of Easter. That's right, a big ANTI-CONSUMER FACT IS COMING-Easter is a religious holiday and egg hunts, easter baskets and candy have nothing to do with the fact we are celebrating the day that Jesus rose from the grave and completed his task, giving us eternal life.
So here is the conversation (that Hannah already started for me):
Hannah: "Mom, I knew you bought me that shirt."
me-"Yes, I did and I have something to tell you. Dad and I don't feel good about lying to you and there isn't an Easter bunny who brings you your basket, it's us. I'm sorry I can't keep telling you that lie, it doesn't feel good."
Taylor: "Yeah I already knew that."
me: "It doesn't mean you won't get Easter baskets anymore, but they are going to be focused on celebrating what Easter is about, not a bunny, OK?" "This doesn't mean you can go around telling other kids there is no Easter bunny, we have to respect what they believe and their family believes and we don't want to make them sad".
Hannah and Taylor: "Okay, can we eat more of our candy?"
Here I was worried about having to go into Santa talk, which we aren't ready for, but there you go. They accepted it, no big deal and onwards we go. I mean, come on, you know there is talk around school, they've already asked me about Santa before.
When I was little, nobody told me the truth, I stumbled upon it myself and didn't think so highly of my parents. Now about the tooth fairy..........